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In the Good Old Boyz Tavern wryly whisking the spider shadows away...the Big Fella, his eminency principal in the Rival Corps Firm, avec ses retinue, "Gesundheit mein freunde, benedicite in illo tempore..." the Holy Father's voice trailed off into the dusty corners of the tavern sponged up in the triple rotor Dyson maximum efficiency vacuum: Crimpett and Crockle cracking up subterraneous "We got it dude! We know what the Pope laid on R. Juna on the 18th floor of Bhagavad Central..., in April 0f Oh Eight."
here is the transcript (trans.): in illo tempore...way back when, fratres [let's translate that as 'associate'] brothers I mean 'associates' ---wait start over: "Associate R. Juna...we could have squared up all of our business (negotium) thousands of years ago...R. Juna: "But how, your Holiness?"
The Intellectual property law my son... The Jesus' Name is Mother Church's copyright. We own it! We have got the legal documents to prove it... "Yes but your eminence those documents are not of the modern era...intellectual property law did not exist in the time of Ambrosius." Silence, we have the documents, we have the lawyers, we have the will of the people...Domus dei...
Martin Luther may have nailed it on the head with the 95 theses but he did not cover his ass on intellectual property."
"I cannot believe what you are saying Holy Father!"
"Yes, the protestants are ours!! We own them and now we are going to reel them into the Holy See. It's called the End User Licensing Agreement thanks to our loyal associates over at MicroMacro, Billboy, Billybob, and Bobbywhacker...And at last count we have over five billion souls who have signed off on it..."
"No way. What signatures...."
Why don't you tell them Super Maximus?:
"Well... the click is as good as the signature... no! I would say it's better wouldn't you Monsignor Guido?" "Yes," said the age pocked cardinal, "...the click has the same effect. Not to mention, we went around and bought up all of these "agreements" from GAFA: Google, Facebook, Amazon, and Apple, you know everybody has clicked off on some type of legal agreement, otherwise they cannot access the goodies on zee web... Well we bought all of this legal binding for pennies on the dollar at the last jubilee when everybody was off on vacation, and now all of the clicks are ours...the end user is the Holy See..."
Wow, too much Holy Dude!
"So yeah, that is not a problem the world is going to fall right back into our hands...imagine every megachurch...imagine all of the corporate religions...you tell Harry Krishna we own his ass...Bhagavad America is ours!!"
"Calm down Supreme Pontiff...let's be rational..."
At this point Pope Benedict left off speaking in latin and careened back into a smattering of his native tongue...
"Nein zay not this to see...Zeinsvergessenheit...Heidegger und the others...Alles, ours, now the Time is now...monarchia, virtual crusade, get Bill Gates on the Phone."
A Word From Bucks विपासना
With this ended one of the most puzzling encounters we have ever had to face in our literary effort...with this the gauntlet was tossed with this came the "battle of the Field" Kurukshetra dude not simply in terms of space and time no, we are talking American Pie, Virtual Reality, Crack Cocaine, we are talking about Bhagavad America.
From the boardroom of corporate headquarters, 28 stories up, Arjuna stood dejected, nearly weeping, Hanuman leaping about on his leash, anguish seized his consciousness, the hair on his arms bristled, “The game wearies me. All of the great heroes are gone, my mother is gone. Life is a swirling carousel, faster in the middle of life and faster and faster, and yet why, why indeed should I kill? Why should I as much as speak or lift my arm? To act in itself is foolish or seems so to me. I see my cousins, beloved uncles, well worn battle heroes facing off against our beloved kinsmen.”
Why even bother getting off the couch? Why open another can of beer, or whatever?
Because it’s all rigged and none of it makes a difference. Yes the opposing armies are slain, but that means its rigged I mean what’s in front of you seems real enough, but upon further reflection, is shifting, not solid, that is why Krishna is so gun-ho in his advice, and he can afford to be, for christsakes, he is an executive, tied in with the 3 big boys over at Brahshivish.com---Brahma, Vishnu and Shiva, Ltd.,LLC. He knows what is coming down as far as new product lines, gadgets, downloads, upgrades, you name it.
“Yet you must act Arjuna. Thinking alone is not fully living and it is a quantum leap from thought to action, as you well know, too much thinking has demoralized you---now is the time for action. Do not fear the soldiers arrayed before you, fully armed, bent on torture, I have slain them all long ago, before me, I can see your dharma---think upon your virtue. After all, you can't really make a mistake, everything will succeed, because it cannot but help to do so. Its been 'rigged' transcendentally.
“Don’t you see,” cried Krishna to Arjuna, caught up in the vision of Vishnu, “all of these things you call ‘favorites’, ‘stars’, ‘obsessions’ and other such things are to be likened unto a vortex of on the one side something abstract like numbers, and on the other by… monomania.
“Monomania is the name of the game buddy boy, get them here, get them there, if you want to bug someone use the form of a mosquito. Man is a thinking being, and the mosquito is a tiny little beast, but when the midgets are in full number, even the tallest man is brought to his knees.”
“But every now and then you get one of these monomaniacs (I know the term is rarely used these days)---and these guys, let me tell you are up for the job. We are talking about clinical obsession, I mean, Ghandi’s hunger strikes, or Einstein’s E=MC2 which led to the atomic bomb.”
“Nuclear war is nothing new, there were such wars in the time of the dynasty, 5000 years ago. You get me your Bhagavad Corporate monomaniac, and I will cut the deal with you on the Bhagavad Bucks Campaign! Is it a deal?”
OK but before you step out there onto the playing field, we better get together with the good old boys and drink some whiskey and rye.”
Arjuna smiled uncomfortably, As a matter of fact, he understood most of what Krishna said, but the part about ‘whiskey and rye’ and ‘good old boys,’ ‘american pie’ to be honest he didn’t have a clue what Mr. K. was going on about. Still he saw how much it meant to him so he just played along. He figured someone might come along later down the track and help out with the interpretation of the text.
Swami Chuck E. Bucks Purport ोमोड जहद
Good old boys, other than being the guys singing down at the levee in the chevys in the anthem---refers to the middle management down at Corporate. This is the PR: the good ole boys weren't all that bad. These were the guys who seemed to be slain! The night of the living dead, I know I shouldn’t say so, but kind of like 50sish black and white TV sets acting as conduits and channels for these heavyweight spriritual heroes. Just tuning them in is part of GOB technology. Look if you send enough information fast enough eventually some of it is going to come back. So, yes, with Whiskey and Rye(tm) Technology, we are bringing back these super revered spiritual gurus, of course, in a mellow fashion, I mean they aren’t going to start bossing us around! :)
How do you know that this is not an endless loop? This is the link to the song that sort of materialized the whole thing:http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iMlzfpwJZuc
Required Reading
If all of my readers were students, I might scold them for merely skimming the text---perusing, instead of reading thoroughly. Be at ease, I am not going to hold it as a mark against you. To be honest, the chapter title 'required reading' does not refer to reading assignments or undergraduate syllabi. No, there is another meaning referring to the background information you are going to need if you want to press on with reading Bhagavad America. Characters need to be introduced, and at least a modicum of historical
framework should be exposed.
Bhagavad America has been accused of many things: being a philosophical essay under disguise as fiction; some say it is a very loose translation of the Bhagavad-Gita into contemporary american shopping habits, and corporate values---others have found it inscrutable and that is OK. I have corrected the text including a narrator named Chuck E. Bucks, sometimes known as Chubuck Eebee Bubucks, and affectionately referred to as 'Chucks' and 'Chuckles'. Chuck E. Bucks makes reading Bhagavad America a lot easier with his useful purports or commentaries. If you find the text difficult, hang on and Chuckles will pop up to help you out and explain what is happening in the story. If you are wondering about his "take" on things and whether his purports are reliable...well, that is up to the reader to figure out. Mr. Bucks has had some issues to deal with (who hasn't), secondly he was the only americanoid willing to take on this potentially politically incorrect project, and finally, he has been enrolled in an online learning institution and we think that he has been absorbing some socialistic ideas from his business ethics prof. Bottomline, he is doing the best he can and that is good enough for me!
Celestial Sky (tm) is the "only game in town", everyone thinks that the system, the government and the market are simply arbitrary "realities" whereas in fact, there is not one speck of this reality which is not 'conditioned' by the executives in Celestial Sky. That's right, every bit, every flower petal, or drop of blood has been fixed, predetermined if you will, transcendentally.
Chairman K.
Krishna played the most beautiful melody on his flute and then leaned back reflectively: "Pardon me if I lecture a bit, but here’s the deal: All that human beings do as human beings is to act, just a million types of acts and action. And the thing that ties the thought to the act this is the key thing," Krishna shouted enthusiastically. "It is called intention, or aim, 'telos' in Aristotle, that which sets the ball in motion is an intention, what you call goal. All of these actions and set of actions caught up in the totality of chain of material energy and its consequence, taken all together in a summation... The act is the first step in the chain of a tapestry of material consequences leading up to the totality of the acts (World). The point of contact of the spiritual soul and the World is not the act, but what precedes even this as an intention.
In the real game ethics is all that matters! Real ethics, not “applied” ethics or even corporate ethics, as was the rage in the states in the earliest years of the 21st century. Not seeing the real game, ethics came to be severely misunderstood. Ethics, real ethics, has to do with intention alone, the inward move that sets one to act. Now of all of the governing motives which might inform the intention, health, security, love, serving the will of God is the highest and best motive for each individual act and the totality of all of one’s acts. And hence surrender to God alone serves as the ultimate motive and intention for all acts. Being in the game (the field =kurukshetra) is mandatory and necessary for material being, and the human must choose, decide and act to engage in material reality and its world."
"Think of Karma, and its affiliates," chuckled Krishna. "The whole spanking ballgame is wrapped up in each of these minute causes and effects which constitute the entire material universe, however, note that human will and intention is of another sort of order than Karma. Karma is not literally the material things in their totality, but the manner in which they are organized specifically in relation to the human person’s interior will and morality. Whiskey in itself as Jesus pointed out does not cause sin, nor do things that enter the mouth defile, but what proceeds from the mouth, this defiles. This pertains to individual will and the power to speak authentically."
"Will, intention, thought, speech, logos, are ingredients that compose the glue that binds material into reality, yes ingredients! But who is cooking, my friend, who is chef? The pilot of the soul? The ego? What is this? Let us liken it unto a symphony. The material, the acts, the intentions, and the conductor who synthesizes all of these disparate fragments and pieces, like melodies floated from cellos, and supported by flutes."
"The citizen or soldier must provide the glue to make the world cohere as it appears to them in the play supplying meaning. How? The putting together of the pieces just like the music in a symphony is an artistic, aesthetic function of the mind. Connecting narratively, hermeneutically, from embryo until decay. The form and essence of this ‘harmony’ are inseparable as a stream and its bed.
"The human person is the supreme filmmaker, editing clips of experience, connecting into a narrative, all of these things into the story of their life. Not God, but godlike. No person establishes or creates the brute material existence of the universe, enough if viewed as the contents of a dream, in all of these dreams it is still viewing material content." Krishna then left Arjuna on the battlefield, amazed and confused.
Mr. Chucks Waxes Lyrical ुह्फपोवेहक्फ
I don't know about you, but whenever I hear such eloquent and profound speech, I am for a moment simultaneously transparent and baffled.
I am thinking of Siddhartha in Herman Hesse’s novel finally arriving to the bank of the river and gazing down into the muddy mirror, he sees all, God, OM, E=MC2. But also there is the sense of the ‘floating world’ of Zen Buddhism. What are we after all actually looking at?
What is the essential meaning of the Buddha? It pertains to awakening becoming nature. What is the precise nature of awakening?
All of these questions seem foolish, all at once the words flare up as words, as nothing more than words, all at once one sees the gap between words and ‘existence’. Out of the corner of one’s eye in this split instant there is a presentation of the totality of the insignificance of words, plus all that those words purport to name. This experience or sensibility is the key thing in the awakening, where it is not cozy anymore, tucked in with flannel booties of one’s language.
Yes, it is difficult to face up to this gap. The poet is well experienced with the obstacles and challenges of matching word to the reality of what is “out there”. That is the key technical challenge in poetry. The essential part of the poetry is the wonder, delight, in which the poet meets life, nature and attempts to speak to its core. We might even go further and say that the essential thing is the object of beauty (such as the rose, or the rabbit) even nature itself! But this amounts to saying nothing at all because the beauty of the flower is simply that, and yet it takes someone to notice. Questions of poetics are more on the side of the technique of words than the object side of ‘beauty’, ‘nature’, ‘existence’ and so on. However, this wonder or being struck by a set of affairs in the world is what forges poetry to rise up in the soul, only then must it be hammered into verse, red with fire.
The Difference that doesn't Make a Difference
R. Jay was summoned away from Chairman K. to the 12th floor of corporate towers to meet with Billy Beemer, chief PR exec. in the BhagavadAmerica superstores. Them good ole boys were drinking whisky and rye...
"Look, R. Jay, we don't need to manipulate them directly, our focus group came up with a much more subtle strategy."
"Addictions is where it is at---compulsive gambling, alcohol, sex, whatever...The thing to remember that it is not about the behavior playing poker or smoking, or binge eating. What we are looking for is a public confession, a testimonial or a change of heart which used to be the business of churches. The media are all over this because it packs a potent punch for the viewer. We want to make believers out of these people, damn it!"
Beemer's speech trailed off like a scuttle of roaches.
R. Jay sat there like a sponge in utter disbelief.
"Belief in what Beemer?"
"Oh, nothing, you know, the empty shell, karma, hundreds of rebirths, whatever it takes to sell that is the way we must go!"
R. Jay, couldn't contain himself any longer and popped like a piece of corn in the microwave oven:
"whoa, hold on right there Mr. Beemer, you are telling me that the world's most powerful corporation in the world has no belief in God? Where do you find the sense of what is right?"
Beemer squirmed around in his swivel chair nursed his Whiskey and Rye, and lit up his pipe in a furious flash, defensively cutting: "I'm in PR---it's party line, technically speaking this corporation is not Hindu, I ,mean, even the Buddha himself stated that one of the Four Noble Truths is that one should not project a belief in God, because it sacrifices individual autonomy. It is a kind of false idol since the fundamental nature of God is mysterious. And finally, what difference does it make? Even technical experts in Vedic matters have concluded that Brahman is simply energy and Einstein expressed the meaning of the woid 'OM' in the equation E=MC2. The very basic substance, stuff, or God...you call it..in my eyes it simply does not make a difference."
At this point R Jay leaned back meditatively and stroked his chin..."I don't know, Beemer, I mean, it is obvious that you and your associates are working very, very hard up here in PR---down in the dungeons of finance we came up with a new slogan: "The difference that makes no difference(TM)."
Beemer smiled, "The difference that makes no difference, the difference that makes no difference," like a mantra---now that is some subtle theology!! He just kept rolling it over in his head like a pebble in one of those rock polishing tumblers.
Then he started to remember his first Chevy and the time he met the Beatles.
PRESOCRATIC
The most salient factor of this age is the Beatles, and the cultural, marketing revolution that they spawned. But what is it about the Beatles that made them so attractive, so unique and popular? So if you want to know a secret, I'll give you a clue...
Beemer was just a teen in the mid-60s and R. Juna was not even born. Beemer actually started out as a "good kid". He adored the Beatle's music, and dreamed of getting to meet the lads from Liverpool. In fact, he did not realize that his uncles were involved in putting these guys on the map at the "toppermost of the poppermost" as John Lennon liked to say. The Beatles, in fact, were not only working for Celestial Sky, loyal, devoted adherents to the corporate vision, but they were also actually tied in with TriuniSys.com, even though the dot com boom was years away---which makes a right good story in itself!
Since Beemer's uncles were all rapped up with Celestial Sky and TriuniSystems with stock options and being privy to the inner circle he figured someone could hook them up and in fact did, on August 22, 1966 in LA. You can actually see him amongst the Beatles backstage on Brian Epstein's personal and very rare 8mm footage. Even though "Eppie" was not there (he was over at the Chateau Marmot in Beverly Hills) he sent a long a little Brownie 8mm movie camera. The footage is out there, I for one saw the photograph of little Beemer with the fabsom in a book published in Canada. What most Beatle fans do not know is that after meeting the Fab Four, this cheerful young boy with dark curls and freckles, proceeded to associate with some hawks scalping tickets outside the LA Forum. Strange looking people...might have been foreigners, you know, LA Forum there's bound to be some "weird shit going down".
Long story short, the kid bought a joint and that would have been OK but someone had dipped the cigarette paper in pure lysergic acid (LSD). Beemer tripped out but it did not go well. It's what they call a "bad trip". Oh, he came back with his faculties intact, or so it seemed but something happened to his faith. It might of had to do with one of the foreigners, he seemed to be from Amsterdam, but nobody really knew. Little "Beems" simply up and lost it. And he got so into money, it was odd I tell you, to see someone that driven in business, I mean until its like a total sickness. Something he got very good at. Now don't get me wrong all those years with Bhagavad America he stood by the party line. He was dutiful and if he did not believe in the ancient corporate rituals he was at least willing to play along for the good of the order. And that is the way he got to the top of Bhagavad and managed to win back his ancestors the family jewel. The Garver family was willing to follow and stand by Beemer.
There had been no legitimate challenge to the Bhagavad kingdom until R. Juna came into his own within the marketing division at Bhagavad Central. Technically, R. Juna was working for Beemer, but the corporation's rule is rightfully his. That's right, I said that the corporation is totally rightfully his! Beemer ain't backing down, the battle has been postponeable up to now from both parties' view. But when the dot com revolution kicked in, and then the boom in the market in the late '90s, and finally 9/11. From these epochal events flowed a series of setbacks and a transvaluation of value to quote Nietzsche, that actions which brought the brash multimillionaire into the inevitable clash with honorable R. Juna. Not to mention what was going on politically in the States at that time, as if no one knows, the bizarre twist---it was as if transcendental freedom was being rendered null and void by surveillance techniques, elite "innercore" computer communities unimaginable to everyday users. The amazing thing is the fact that the 'innercore' computer's capacities and artificial intelligences exponentially multiplied putting Bhagavad America.com on top of the heap. So much so that a sacred battle could be fought 'virtually'.
That's what we are trying to sell you! Eighteen days of hornblowing, cart racing, soul fabricating warfare at at the Kurukshetra Mall during the final clearance sale as described in the pages of Bhagavad America, all for your pleasure.
A Comment from Mr. Chuckles
Look, anyone can offer you a novel that entertains. But only Bhagavad America satisfies you with a wealth of market intelligence and insights from the top industry analysts---from up to the minute revelations from CelestialHierachy.com they have information and market truths backed up with eons of battle experience.
Why settle for human generated, recycled, third party research?
Let's break for an ad...
Bhagavad America family of superstores , boutiques, cafes and themeparks the world over, welcomes you!
Dial 1 800 SPIRITT or enroll online at http://bhagavadamerica.blogspot.com/
Earn up to 1000 points and save up to 100% at Eurobhag Themepark as part of the 'non-spending (tm)' promotion!
"A splendid time is guaranteed for all!" For all that is, save Beemer and his sons.
"I always get the feeling, said Arjuna, that whatever I am reading---the gist of what matter is made of even speculations concerning the macrocosmos---it is like a PR job!"
NO, no nooo! Shouted Beemer. It is the ultimate snow job.
IT IS EITHER TO BE OR TO KNOW.
All being is particular being.
There is no 'Being in general.'
Man is the measure, may be translated "man is the mean'.
The balance, or fulcrum at which reality "hangs together" or "is harmonized".
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